Dame Darcy dot com

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Past Events 2007

12/22/07
Meat Vagina Cake Technology Handmaidens wanted! Love Dame Darcy

Art Auction.........................Meat Cake #16,
Current Events....................Vaginapaloosa, Tori Amos Comic book comp
Current Affairs..................... Assistants wanted : NY based Technology handmaidens and Shoot/edit gallantry


CURRENT AFFAIRS

WANTED: TECHNICAL HANDMAIDENS (guys please apply too) and NY based videotographer/ editor.
It’s no secret that Granny (meaning me) has assisted living. Also no beating around the preverbal bush I’m Bi costal (and its also debatable that I may be bipolar and bisexual as well) so for this reason I am in NY for a while and I’m setting up camp here to produce Gasoline the feature film based on my next graphic novel that will be released on Halloween 08.
<P>Also we are developing a doll game for the Gothic Lolita set in Tokyo and Oh so much more:

Technical handmaidens:
We want creative thinkers that are flexible and independent and reliable. We can give you school credit or referrals, also fun and prizes!
Blogging, cataloging, some crafts and mail. Putting together packages for the movie and an assortment of other things that may come up.

Videotographer/ editor:
We want to do I pod casts on a regular basis and also document the Gasoline movie production process and live music shows. We intend to also pitch the Gasoline TV show as a reality show as well. We have a kickass cinematographer /editor in LA but we need one in NY as well.
Please contact me at the agency section of Dame Darcy.com: damedarcy1@msn.com say
Technical Handmaiden ahoy! Or Videographer/ Editor in subject line.
We need you ASAP

Love you!

DD


ART
Ok, so Meat Cake 16 just came out, you can order it off the Fantagraphics books website. It will soon be available on Dame darcy.com as well. It’s really exciting and features a centerfold of my porn (which is actually pretty sailor boys in their swimming attire frolicking in paradise), also it features the Excorsisters, which is a prelude to a graphic novel I’m doing. Advice for life through witchcraft. About 4 teen girls in a rock band. As well as a weird fairytale that really happened to me, I went to catalina island and snuck into a ball with glass slippers and got a beautiful opal diamond and gold ring. Also don’t forget creepy granny on the cover and the story inside that explains granny’s eternal youthful appearance and how she tricks the girls of Meat Cake.


10/04/07
THIS WEEK

Art/Fashion.........................1988 Gallery In San Francisco Etsy and E bay auctions Ghost Dolls for Halloween!
Current Events............................................................................................................Silicon in San Jose


Art/ Fashion
Ok so the Haloween season is officially on. Thus the ghost dolls are back with a vengence/passion on Dame Darcy.com. Also, I’m in a group show in San Francisco on October 6th at the 1988 Gallery 1173 Sutter St. 94109 7:00 on thanks to Anthony Ausgang for currating this awesome show! Plus check out E bay and Etsy, and upcoming design projects for Jared Gold, it’s really exciting, dolls, accessories and lots of other fanciful luxurious items!

Current Events
I’m doing events, book signings and other exciting things at Silicon in San Jose. Friday Oct 5th through Oct 7th.
On Friday Oct 5th is the instore performance at Streetlight Records also in San Jose. Starting at 5:00 on
www.siliconventions.com has my schedule and everything.

CURRENT EVENTS
VAGINAPALOOSA!!! Need I say more!?
Ok, I need to: Hosted by your favorite comedienne and musical chanteuse Jessica Delfino, and featuring the Banjocentric antics of Black Strap (yes we are back, we are the undead) Dame Darcy on banjo singing sea shanties and murder ballads, Peter Mavrogerogis lead guitarist from Bellmer Dolls (and Vanity Set) and Kai Eric on bass. This is a variety show with lots of ladies with talent! Center Stage 48 W. 21st st 4th fl. Buzzer #7 New York City 10010 10:00 Saturday the 15th of December.

Black Strap will also be on web TV on Tuesday December 18th East Coast Aliens hosted by Jared Wiggam.
Visit this link! Yes, the modern format for today’s viewing pleasure, now conveniently available! See the critically acclaimed NY public Access show ^v^ Turn of the Century ^v^, featuring Movies and Animation by DD and Blessed Elysium.

8/30/07
This Week:
Art Fashion Auction:
Coutre chockers and other earthly delights!
Current Events:
GASOLINE BOOK DEAL!!!
Love Letter/Current Affairs:
I love Corey Michael Smithson the Animator and Comic Con news!
Patron Saint:
Judith.

Hand Book For Hot Witches:
Sunburn? Not with oatmeal around!


Art/ Fashion Auctions:
Satanica Batcakes, the miraculous fire eater of yore has cooked up some crafty concoctions for all to enjoy heartily, lovley chockers, broaches, necklaces and etc each hand drawn by yours truly!
http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZkellyrobin1967
Also, lovely paintings , fine art and other delightful dainties to be seen at etsy:
http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=5213500
As well as the Dame Darcy e bay auction :
http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZdame_darcy
Gotta love it!

Current Events!
Oh my God everybody it’s officially on! The Gasoline graphic novel book deal is in progress with a due date slated for Oct 08 published by Merrell books based in NY and London. They do fancy art books that are distrubited internationally.They recently did an amazing book of The Dinner Party by Judy Chicago, an awesome groundbreaking feminist and I am elated and honored to be published by the same company. Her book is a through womens history and I have taken an exerpt from it, profiling Judith in her honor. I am so happy and excited that my appocalyptic dreams are coming true at last and awesome movie teams are in the process of putting together the feature film based on Gasoline at this very moment! Hey, so if any one has any questions or resources for this indepent movie endevor, I know I have mentioned this before but sed em my way, its happening faster now because of the book deal and it’s very exciting. I spend all my time now drawing, I have to do at least two drawings a day to meet the Oct 07 deadline, so no social life for me really lately, but I don’t care. I’m with the ink faeries! Thanks Joan Brookbank for caring about my life’s goal and making it happen in a classy way and to Maya Gottfried for hooking me up, you are golden!

Current Affairs/Love Letters
Speaking of Ink Faeries AND LOVE check out the awesome and amazing animation of Corey Michael Smithson. http://www.coreymichaelsmithson.com/Movies/AssemblyTest_e_NTSC_512K.swf He is absolutely the Bomb and has created an amazing animated commercial for witchcraft using the illustrations I did for the Gasoline Graphic novel. Its going with my reel to present with the rest of the package for Gasoline the movie. I LOVE HIM, his other work is genius, no kidding. You know that feeling of when you view a sunset while holding the head of a fragile little new born kitten in your hand while wearing ruby slippers and you get so excited rainbow stars burst out of your vagina as you fly? Well this is how I feel about Corey. Also speaking of Ink Faerie adventures,among others I met Jill Thomson (Scarry Godmother) and Neil Gaiman (Stardust) at the comics con and they were so amazing in person! It was a dream come true! This comics con was the best one ever thanks to my friend Cesar who really knows his stuff I have to say, the con this year was super intense and magical. More to be revealed later as it unfolds...Ha Ha Ha Ha!

Patron Saint
Judith
Judith is a legendary jewish figure, a devout and learned woman who’s story lies in the shadowy realm of history and fiction because it is from the 6th century BC. and told in the book of Judith. Her town of Bethulia had been taken over by the Assyrian general Holofernes and his troops. Who forced Jews into exile, took them into slavery, and committed rape on the jewish women. Judith couldn’t take it any more so she devised a plan. All dressed up in finery, smelling of perfume and carrying a basket of food an wine, she easily passed by the soldiers as if going to a party (of their doom) . Holofernes was bewitched bothered and beguiled by the glamour of Judith and invited her into his tent. Skilled with herbs and powders, she prepared the wine so it quickly put him to sleep. Quickly, she caught the tyrant by the hair and cut his head off with his own sword in two sharp strokes. She then put his head in the pick nick basket and reached the gates of the city with out being caught. When she placed his head on a spike at the front gate for all to see the Jews rose up against her oppressors who were now confused with out their leader and then retreated. That evening the women honored Judith with feasts and praises, holding a special ceremony in which they sang, played instruments, and danced into the night. Free at last!
Handbook For Hot Witches
I love to surf. Its one of the things to do at the beach near the survivalist compound that looks like Gasoline where I am currently drawing Gasoline. I go swimming and surfing in the ocean almost everyday. The ocean sends up an effervescent foam all around and its the only place to escape the stifiling smog and heat of LA. I swim with dolphins, and seagulls. I saw a seal the other day, it swam past me at a very close distance and looked back for a minute mirroring my curosity then casually dissappeared under the waves. The one problem with surfing at night is the creepy black fish swim against my legs and I am prompted to move from the water, these are the fish that accompany sharks my mermaid friend said. So for this reason though I love to swim at night I don’t any more, thus, dispite sunblock and hats sunburn is still a reality. One time when visiting my family in Idaho I went to Gold Bug, a magical place in the mountains with three teirs of waterfalls and swam with my brothers and cousins. It was so amazing! That night we slept in the boughs of trees under the stars but the next day I had the worst sunburn of my life! My cousin Angela Devine suggested to mix oatmeal with room tempature water, make it into a paste and put it on the sunburn. As it dries it takes out the burn and leaves you with a smooth pale complexion. It really worked! But as I lay on the lawn chair in the shade with oatmeal all over my face and arms, I fell asleep and the dogs licked it all off.
Attention cute witches! Come out and play with us on for Summer Solstice!

Mr. Brooke Shields & Bilge Baron* / MMNY Festival
and the NY Marble Cemetery
present:

A Haunted Procession

at the New York Marble Cemetery
2nd Avenue above 2nd Street
down the long, long alley (next to the funeral home)
www.marblecemetery.org

This unusual, somewhat secret cemetery is rarely open, so come and see this
serene, little-known NYC landmark and public historical space as it is
hosted by a procession of ghostly sea banshees performing spooky,
enchanting, operatic acoustic art-metal in a short (20 min) spector-laden
spectacle. This picnic-parade will be a rare, haunting acoustic set by the
normally outrageous quartet known as "Haunted Pussy", but today we must be
sonically gentle, as the delicate crumbling walls of the cemetery can’t
tolerate our typical metal decibels. Expect to witness something truly
spectre-tacular and magical. This unique "HP" show will be like none we’ve
ever done or will do again. Dress in ship’s captain clothing or the antique
lace threads of their mistresses and servants, like the ones buried there.
Indeed, sea-themed costume is encouraged.

Accompanying us in our procession will also be a band of melodic banshees,
classically trained string players and the dreamy mermaid murder-ballad
singing sea shantress, the one and only Dame Darcy.

4:00 PM - get comfortable, pick a spot to lay your blanket,
set up your picnic
4:30 PM - The musical parade / charade ensues (until about 5 PM)
5:00 PM on - enjoy the calm serenity of the Marble Cemetery until 8 PM.
This event is FREE, as part of the "Make Music NY" festival which encourages music in public places throughout NYC on JUNE 21st, 2007 - the first day of summer
www.mmny.org

Dogs welcome
B.Y.O: picnic, blanket, chair, hand-held fan, sun hat, snacks
(some chairs will be available there for your use)

Lemonade and light refreshments will be available for purchase, home-made and sold by 13 year old Rachel Trachtenburg (of Trachtenburg Family Slideshow Player fame!!) www.slideshowplayers.com


*Bilge Baron & Mr. Brooke Shields are known
for their work with Haunted Pussy.

About The Haunted Pussy:
www.hauntedpussy.com
www.myspace.com/hauntedpu55y
(note the 5’s for s’s)
www.myspace.com/hauntedpussygoesacoustic
Haunted Pussy is a histrionic fear-metal band that delivers
ghoulish, mysterious, glorious tone poems in multi-genres.

---------------------------

Can’t wait to see you there!

Love,
Dame Darcy
Hello from New York!

6/13/07
Art/ Fashion Auction........................................Originals and lovely neck ornaments

Current Events................................................Mermaid cabarets June 15th and June 16th

Love Letters/Current Affairs...............................NYC

Patron Saint..................................................Goody Glover

Hand Book for Hot witches..............................Purification Spell


Art/Fashion*
Dear Satanica and I have become very crafty. She is an incredible seamstress
and together we have created chokers for every occasion featuring hand drawn
cameos by yours truly, witness the miracle on Ebay as well as my framed one
of a kind illustrations.
See them all here: http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZkellyrobin1967QQhtZ-1

Current Events*
I’m doing a mermaid cabaret at Rubulad in Brooklyn on June 15th early, like
11:00 then the same night I’m performing in the east village at Mo Pitkins
Radical Vaudeville the show strats after midnight. Its on Ave. A between 2nd
and 3rd. I’ll go into fishy details a little closer to the show. Please do
attend, we are so very classy.
Details here:
21 + over bring ID
Rubulad presents
Pantheistic Panty Raid!

Friday, June 15

Bands:
Julz A’s Squeeze Rock
Queen May and The Bells
Electric Junkyard Gamelan
I Love You Airlines

DJs:
Gimme Gimme Dan
Marty Violence
Sports Casual
Catalyst
B Dub
Justin Carter


Cabaret Stage:
Dark Dark Dark
Dame Darcy
J Aaroneous


Plus:
Special performance by Bruno Wizard of The Homosexuals
Amy Shapiro as Shiva
Norm Francoeur’s Light Circus
Food by Vicious Delicious
Sweets by Brownie Points


In the starlight Lounge:
G Scopitronic’s Non-Stop Film Fest
Yummy Bar-B-Que
and more!


Dress: it’s a sexy god and goddess thing.


10 beans before 11:00, in costume or way late; 15 beans otherwise; 21+ w/
ID, please.

You can help us continue to have a Rubulad in this space by being quiet
coming and going, staying inside the space during the event and not pissing
all over the sidewalk as soon as you get around the corner – which,
incidentally, does attract the police and they will write you
a summons.

The less our neighbors have to complain about, the more fun we can have.

Love Letter/ Current Affairs*
NYC is fun and fantastic so far. Its been a whirlwind of fun parties and art
events all over town! I love my Gemini ladies and mermaid friends. Its
really been birthday o rama. I’m got some great news about publishing for
Gasoline and for the production for the movie, more will be revealed as the
plot thickens for this endeavor. Stay tuned in.

<3,
Dame Darcy

6/05/2007
THIS WEEK

Alice In Wonderland Framed Illustrations and Jane Eyre Originals.......................
................watch out!
Current events..............................................I heart NY
Love letter/current affairs................................interveiws by
ladies named "Kat" and "Cat"
Hand book for hot witches..............................sex magic
Patron Saint..................................................Helen of Troy


Alice In Wonderland framed illustrations and Jane Eyre originals

I’ll be in NY the month of June so I wont be able to do my usual Ebay
auctions, but Ebay auctions will be happening in a diferent way so WATCH
OUT for them in the upcoming weeks

Current Events

As I mentioned before, I’m going to NYC for the month of June which means
I’m going to be doing MERMAID FIN-SPLASHTIC EVENTS! Cabaret, the mermaid
parade and my birthday! I’ll post the performance dates while I’m in NY so
you cute east costers can go.

Love Letter/Current Affairs

For a strange and coincidental reason I was recently interveiwed by two
ladies who have completely seperate worlds but they are both named "Cat"
MEOW! Here are the interviews:

http://www.cutoutandkeep.net/snippets/dame_darcy

2/27/2007
THIS WEEK LOVE AND REPULSION

ART/Fashion ..................................... New limited edition
DD prints and original illos available now!

Current Events.................................. Dame Darcy Art
Exhibits ccoming up

Love Letter/ Current Affairs................ The Hearst Castle, the
woods and oceans of CA

Patron Saint.................................... Marion Davies

Hand Book For Hot Witches................How to Survive



Current Events

I have some art shows/ exhibits coming up. A group show curated by
and featuring the artworks of Thomas Han in March, I’ll be showing with
my favorite * Camille Rose Garcia, Mark Ryden, and others. The gallery
is called Maude Carrin and it should be a fantastic time. i don’t know
the exact date but I’ll post another blog closer to when its happening.
I also have a solo show at the Hyena Gallery coming up for may and my
friend Lisa Nardoni just opnened her new Gallery which will be
including me in a group show in April. All of this is the only details
I have thus far, but I assure you I will keep you in the know.

Love letter/current affairs

I can’t help but feel so many mixed emotions about the world lately. I
am in utter and childlike awe of the wonderous beauty of the sparkling
aquamarine ocean, the mountains, european and antique archecture and
staturary, and the beauty of animals and other humans, while at the
same time feel complete repulsion over how disgusting everything is at
the same time. Case in point, seals and relationships.
I went to the Hearst Castle for Valentines Day, it was awesome. A
patchwork collection put together by a fun and visionary millionare,
showing off his cowboy know how about European culture. I like to go to
touristy things like this, last year I went to New Schwannstein, the
castle built in Bavaria by my gay king Ludwig. Gay as in gay (he was
not happy) any way, I digress.
Though I really love these palaces, the way i got to see them was
absolutely disgusting. How could humans be so incredably ugly, wearing
gortex sandles and taking photos of the ugly construction waterpumps at
the hearst castle, sucking on sugar and pushing their prodigy and ugly,
fat, lover people around. I feel disgusted by it because I am no
better, unfortunately. And made of nothing different. I wish i could
just be a fairy made of light and just fly away from this dirty world.
I saw the seals near the castle. I loved their cute ways but was also
disgusted by their smell and loved/hated their weird sounds like
monkey/pig/dogs. They were lying around on each other wallowing in the
mud and having sex near their dead pups.
The tourists watched them facinated.
The old lady who smelled too strongly of lotion, the fat man and wife
in matching red track suits, the lady with the long barbie hair and her
daughters with the same hair. It all made me sea sick.
I think that I think sex is gross. Whats wrong with everybody anyway? I
can’t remember what I thought before? I vaguely remember thinking this
stuff as a kid though, seeing the brazen vaginas in trees and knowing
it was going to be my turn soon. Why does everything have to be so fat
and rutting?
Anyway, I don’t want toseem too negative, I just have put so much
faith and expected so much from people and the world, and perhaps I
shouldn’t think so much.

Patron Saint

Marion Davies
I read the autobiography she wrote as an old lady. I have to say , she
had one of the most amazing lives I have ever heard of. I am not
usually jelous of anyone really but her life, wow, anyone would be.
She’s the reason I went to the Hearst Castle, actually.
She was in some little vaudeville pony show for young girls and her
big sugar Daddy hearst picked her out of the crowd, pulled a few
strings and she was soon playing the lead in silent films in Hollywood,
which at that time were my grandest idea of utopia.
Hollywood was then a hillbilly paradise. All the amazing mountains,
ocean, forests, blooming flowers, but also thespians everywhere in
costumes mixed with the cowboys and native Mexicans but no traffic
jams, overcrowding, and tons of ghetto junk and pollution like there is
today. I wish so bad i could go back in a time-bubble and just ride
around Echo Park in one of those little mini yaughts they had.
Breathing the fresh air of down town LA. Anyway, Marion said she’d just
roll around on the MGM lawn, fly to Europe and still order hamburgers
and milkshakes.
Entertain Brando and (sigh) Valentino at the Hearst Castle, which her
and "Daddy" referred to as the ranch. They had an olympic swimming pool
in all blue and gold mosaic tiles. She even hung out with that airplane
guy "Lindy" who she said seemed nervous. She had such an extraordinary
life and she would just describe it so matter of fact and cavalier.
For this I love her and hate her. I have a love/ hate thing for
everything now a days. She reminds me of , looks like (with blonde wavy
hair and blue eyes), and has the personality of my doll Isabelle, who
is from 1927 and has a really boushie and bratty attitude. At the
cabaret she did with Satanica, she won a Diva award. I think Marion
Davies deserves a similar award and definately got it. However, she is
undeniably (though vampirically) just too cute.

Hand Book for Hot Witches

How to survive...

How to survive a rip tide: To escape a rip current, swim parrallel to
shore until you are beyond the pull ofthe rip current. If you can not
swim out of the rip tide, float on your back and allow the rip tide to
take you away from the shore until you are beyond the pull of the rip
tide. Rip currents generally subside 50 to 100 yards from shore. Once
the riptide subsides, swim sideways and back to shore.

How to find your way with out a compass: You need an analog watch and
a six inch stick.
Nothern hemisphere: Place a small stick vertically in the ground so
that it casts a shadow. Place the watch on the ground so the hour hand
is parallel to the shadow. In the southern hemisphere place your watch
so that the 12:00 is parrallel to the shadow. Find the point on the
watch midway between the hour hand and 12:00 (during day light savings,
summer, 1:00) draw an amaginary line from that point through the center
of the watch. This imaginary line is the north-south line. The sun will
be located toward the south.
Star Method: The north star is the handle of the little Dipper.
Walking toward it means you are walking north. You can use the big
dipper to find the north star. A straight imaginary line drawn between
the two stars at the end of the big dippers bowl willpoint to the north
star.
Southern Hemisphere: Find the southern cross. The southern cross is a
group of four bright stars in the shape of a cross and tilted to one
side. Imagine the long axis extends in a line five times its actual
length. The point where this line ends is south. If you can veiw the
horizon, draw an imaginary line straight down to the ground to create a
southern landmark.
Cloud Method: Generally weather moves east to west.

How to escape when tied up:
When your captors bind you expand your body as much as possble. In
hale and push against the bonds. When your captors are away suck in
your chest and stomach and wriggle free.
Hand and wrist bonds: Keep your wrists apart as much as possible. Use
a stick or spike or pull the bonds free with your teeth. Fold your
thumb into the palm of your hand and work your hands free.
Brace toes and kees together thus keeping ankles apart.

I got this info from a book at my mom’s house called The worst case
scenero survival handbook by Joshua Piven and David Borgenicht.
I picked these because i have this weird fear of being kidnapped, and
so, my dear friends, please keep track of me and make sure it never
happens. Also, I like to swim in the ocean and have been caught in rip
tides before. I also am dyslexic and don’t want a Blair witch scienero
to go down
in the woods not knowing which way is north and get all my friends
teeth ripped out by a flying witch/baby/horse.

2/5/07
THIS WEEK Art Fashion Auction..................Valentines +Tea pots!
Self-Defense Art Fashion Auction Check out the valentine tea sets, all made with love just in time for valentines day! Also new mens ties, valentines dolls, and cards, along with fashion and art! Whoopee! Current Events I posted this event on the last blog but here it is again, and more exciting than ever because its closer than ever! The Festival of Mirth 666. The Love Show! at The CIA 11334 Burbank Blvd. /N. Hollywood to view go to myspace.com/batcakes Starring Satanica with your host Spooky Le Boo Isabelle and her Parasitic twin Dame Darcy The Match Box Puppet show Marionettes by Eli Presner Luxurious Larva Creekbird and his wonderous tunes The Fuxedos Flapper gone bad Loud Louisia Art Star Sandy "Pantelones" Rodriguez DJ Jason Savvy AND MORE!..... Here’s a show I’m currently in Tokyo: CWC 4-3, 2F Sarugaku-cho, Shibuya-ku Tokyo 150-0033 Japan T: 813-3496-0745 F: 813-3496-0747 www.cwctokyo.com Love Letters Valentines Day is really a holiday for the ladies. Most men wouldn’t care about it if they didn’t have to, though I do appreciate and know that there are true romantics out there. So, with that in mind, I’d like to say, to the ladies, that weather your single or not (or don’t care) that the love of your friends and family is not to be underestimated to remember each other and that you are not alone on this day, even if your best friends are with their husband or boyfriend on V day , make a date before or afterward to have a tea party or exchange valentines, and to encourage each other to not feel alone. Don’t believe the hype, you can celebrate any old day any old way you darn well want! Isabelle just told me to mention "And dolls too!" Current Affairs I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I actually like LA lately. The sunsets here in Echo Park are incredible! Perhaps because of the pollution, but whatever, they are psychedelic. Plus I love all my friends and neighbors. My car broke a couple months ago (I’m saving to get a bio-diesel or something next) and I just walk around in my never ending California dreamin’ summer all the time. Maybe I mentioned this before? Anyway, everything else with Gasoline, Meat Cake, Death By Doll, and the Excorsisters, is going well, and I have it a little secret until it is unleashed like a eco-feminist pale pink and glittering black apocalyptic title wave of sweet goodness upon the world. Pray to the Black Madonna every ding dang day that the glory will reign and all rightness restored to what it was before the oil crisis and the advent of industrialist society. Utopia is ours now. Witches not bitches till eternity! Patron Saint Maya Derin You know, the Da Da film maker from the 1940’s. She is so beautiful and nutso. Watch her crawl on the ceiling, and run in hot persuit of the burka mirror faced woman, all the while in bohemian sandles. See how she seduces business men by crawling on their conference table while wearing a tightfitting sexy dress. She watches herself as she sleeps. And what is that key for? Flying people dance among the stars in a dreamscape! She practiced voodoo and I heard died young because she got possessed by a spirit at a party, threw the refrigerator, and died of an aneurysm. I don’t know if this is true, but if your going to go out sometime, you might as well do it so the art crowd is still talking about you + caring about your movies 60 yrs. later and on into the future! Maya, where ever your witchy soul rests, may it find the same magic you bought to us while on your brief stint here. Hand Book for Hot Witches This was sent to me lovingly by my friend Go Go Max I am supposed to send it on like a chain letter to all the girls of the world so here goes: Rapist’s Eyes (No Joke) >>A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what >>they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:
1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed . They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly . Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing.
3) They also look for women on their cell phone , searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered. 4) Men are most likely to attack & rape in the early morning, between 5: 00am. and 8:30a.m.
5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is grocery store parking lots. Number two is office parking lots/garages. Number three is public restrooms.
6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to another location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.
7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.
8) If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.
9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands. Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.
10) Several defense mechanisms he taught us are: If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: "I can’t believe it is so cold out here", "we’re in for a bad winter." Now you’ve seen their face and could identify them in a line-up; you lose appeal as a target.
11) If someone is coming toward you , hold out your hands in front of you and yell STOP or STAY BACK ! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.
12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.
13) If someone grabs you , you can’t beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm (between the elbow and armpit) OR in the upper inner thigh VERY VERY HARD . One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it hurts. 14) After the initial hit, always GO for the GROIN . I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.
15) When the guy puts his hands up to you , grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible . The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.
16) Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts!!! You may feel a little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble. PLEASE READ THEN FORWARD THIS TO EVERY WOMAN YOU KNOW, IT’S SIMPLE STUFF BUT IT COULD SAVE HER LIFE

1/6/2007

Art/Fashion Auction........................Jane Eyre Prints
Current Events...............................Jane Eyre Masterpiece theatre
Movie on PBS+ Festival Of Mirth
Love Letter/Current Affairs...............Rock N Roll Apocalyptic Fairytale
+ DD.com
Patron Saint...................................Susan B. Anthony+Bonus saint
Mary Poppins
Hand Book For Hot Witches..............Have to Believe We are Magic

Art/Fashion Auction

Friend The Girl (from Meat Cake Comix) here to report the latest breaking
news straight from Sobriety Starights. Get This...
The Illustrated Jane Eyre drawings are now available, hand signed in
beautiful color and black and white prints!
Order from the Gallery section of Dame Darcy.com and "soon your prints will
come"( and at an very affordable price.) Also check out Dame Darcy’s latest
E bay auction:

http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZdame_darcyQQhtZ-1

All the hand crafted potholders are sold out, but there’s
several hand crafted coutre fashion items, winter scarves, and last but not
least b/w original framed illos, for auction prices you wont find anywhere
else!
Watch for future items: One of a kind, hand crafted Valentines+ valentine
kits.~FTG

Current Events

Thanks Friend the Girl, I’ll take it over now.~DD
Master Piece Theatre is showing a TV movie about Jane Eyre this Sunday, Jan.
28th, Here’s the link my Mom sent so you can figure out the channel and
times in your area:
http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/masterpiece/janeeyre/index.html

She said it was very dark, exciting, and engaging!
Thanks Mom!

OK after that the next big event is valentine related so I guess its time to
go PSYCHO!
And who more approiate to go psycho with than* Miss Satanica.* It looks like
the witch is up to her merry tricks again with the Festival of Mirth
www.myspace.com/batcakes
666.The Love Show
CIA
11334 Burbank Blvd (N.Hollywood)
(818)506-6353

*With your Host Spooky La Boo
*Starring doll ISABELLE!(And only featuring Dame Darcy)
*Match Box Puppet Show
*Marionettes by Eli Presner
*Luxurious Larva
*FUXEDOS (psychedelic lounge-core)
*flapper gone bad Loud Lousia
*Art Star Sandy "Pantelones" Rodriguez
*DJ Jason Savvy



--------->PART 2<----------

Love Letter

I so do love my production Team The Day Of The Spark Production Coven.
Otherwise known as
.......................................................DOTS.
and I’d better love ’em because together we are living, sleeping, and
breathing Gasoline all day and all night for weeks thus far and now we’re
trippin’ the dark rainbows found floating on the surface of the petrol pool!
It doesn’t look like its going to stop any time soon. So many tasks to
undertake and so many amazing opportunities we have in abundance and awesome
people interested and involved in our movie its awesome!
Thanks Universe ! And in particular Josie Basford, queen savior!
We’ve been brain storming for weeks on the tag line and came up with a few
good ones like...
"Apocalypse?...WOW!" and "Is that an apocalypse in your pocket
or...Gasoline!"
We finally decided on "Rock N Roll Apocalyptic Fairytale".
Here’s the Synopsys Josie and Peter finished last night for the movie, it
rocks!


GASOLINE
“A Rock & Roll Apocalyptic Fairy Tale”

SYNOPSIS

A post -apocalyptic tale of cunning, heart pounding adventure begins at the peak of American society’s corporate greed, corruption, and materialism. A fiery apocalypse reigns down on the world from above and destroys, seemingly, all of earthly civilization.

From the rubble and chaos emerge few survivors. Among them, a whimsical family of orphaned witches (The Armbusters). Having established a utopian village, “Karoi”, the eclectic and erratic Armbusters then work to uphold their position of power through the maintenance of their car, the only working automobile remaining after the great disaster. To do this, they must venture outside their walls of protection in search of gasoline, now more precious than gold.

Their harrowing odyssey through a ruined but aesthetically mesmerizing landscape where nature has superseded technology leads The Armbusters to the many conflicts within themselves, and pits them against the conniving nihilists that now lurk in the abandoned places of decaying urban sprawl. The new dark age is upon them.

Their post-apocalyptic tale is one of hope, and through their trials, they learn to adopt a new way of functioning and are forced to change in order to survive the land they now inhabit. Learning how nature and technology can work harmoniously. Rich with rock performances, glitter and glamour, outrageous characters emerge throughout. Encountering fairies, witches, nihilists, sailor zombies and otherworldly creatures GASOLINE is interlaced with symbolic imagery, dialog and music. We are guided to a passage of magic in a fairy tale of hope for the future of mankind.

A series of animated flashback sequences for the lead characters explain, through their unique experience, how they are exposed to all of the choices and alternatives existing that they were previously blind to while caught up in a life of comparative luxury. It is a supremely artistic and entrancingly bizarre story with contemporary relevance and an ecological message. It provokes intellectual and creative questions, examines human fallibility, and shows us how we can live today, this moment, in harmony with the natural world. It is a perilous and visually stunning tale of danger and suspense, of heartbreak and redemption, of versatility, compassion, strength, and above all, the perseverance of magic and love.

And the latest review:
"Josie, the business plan reads well, it’s clear and concise and has alot of
energy in it. The synopsys is good too. I seldom read a synopsys, so I can
only say that it explained the storyline clearly to me and I want to see the
film! So hurry up and get it made"~ Mom

Thanks for your support mom
(what would we all do with out Mom-power?)

Current Affairs

Thanks to Jackie, Leilani, and Philip, who help me daily with the site and so
many other countless things none of this would be possible . I really love
you guys and appreciate all your awesome skill and talent.
I’ve been working on the new DameDarcy.com designs. Besides upgrading the
art gallery to its full luxuriousness, We’re going to soon enjoy a
recreational community center with fun witch games, clothes to try on, and a
place to hang art and chat with each other, and lots more!
I’m going to make a drive in movie theatre with animation and a game to play
where you can be any Meat Cake Character and explore the weird town they
live in , Sobriety Straights. I’ve been drawing a lot.
I also like to explore my neighborhood. There are a lot of fantastical things
to be found under this rollicking always blue California sky with its ever
blooming flowers and endless fruit trees and cute homes. Today the universe
gave me a wonderous antique mermaid scale purse for free, made entirely of
faux mermaid scales, I know this is worth at least 7 million dollars, I’m
definately going to wear it to the (LA) rap party at the Biltmore Hotel in
down town.

Patron Saint

When Death By Doll played in Olympia and I did a show in Seattle Miss
Oblivious’s beautiful 9 yr. old daughter Darby gave me the cutest doll of
Susan B. Anthony. She lives inside a little paper house, that has an
inscription written in it that made me cry, here’s what it said:

Susan B. Anthony (1820-1906)

A well educated woman with strong moral values. Susan Bronell-Anthony was a
major figure in the movement for women’s suffrage. In November, 1872, she
voted, thereby challenging the law prohibiting women from the polls. She was
tried, convicted, and a fine was levied against her which she refused to
pay.
For over 50 years, Miss Anthony worked for women’s rights to vote. Although
ridiculed, scorned, and discouraged at times, she never admitted defeat. It
was not until 14 yrs. after her death that women won their constitutional
right to vote.

We’re fighting the good fight for you Susan! And we’re not gonna stop!

Speaking of Suffragettes:
Also, have you ever noticed what a hot witch Julie Andrews makes as Mary
Poppins?
She flys around, spins in a periotte so fast she blurrs, she puts on makup
while sitting on a cloud floating above England, she is always really
together and runs by strict school teacher rules but lives in total magic
and serendipity. She wins all the awards and all the boys love her, but
she’s not fame grabby or slutty about it, she just takes it as matter of
fact. She has amazing blue eyes, dark hair, a suffragette costume and little
vampire teeth that show when she sings. Her crystal ball is a snow globe,
birds love her. And she works for a rich lady who is a suffragette. Plus
she makes dolls alive!
HOT! Speaking of Hot witches...

Hand Book For Hot Witches
Here’s a little ditty from that fairy movie we all know and love Xanadu.
Its the anthem for our DOTS production coven and it’s awesome. I know it’s
got past associations with nerdy 13 yr old girls from the 80’s but seriously
seperate it (or conjoin it) with that and really look at the lyrics. They
are a serious magic spell, and BTW Xanadu was a very successful feature
film.

Come take my hand
you should know me
I’ll always be in your mind
You know I will be kind
I’ll be guiding you

Building your dream
has to start now
theres no other road to take
you won’t make a mistake
I’ll be guiding you

You have to believe we are magic
nothing can stand in our way
you have to believe we are magic
don’t let your aim ever stray
and if all your hopes survive
destiny will arrive
and make all your dreams alive
for you

From where I stand
you are home free
the planets align so rare
there’s promice in the air
and I’m guiding you

Through every turn
I’ll be near you.
I’ll come any time you call
I’ll catch you when you fall
I’ll be guiding you

You have to believe we are magic!
Nothing can stand in our way
you have to believe we are magic
don’t let your aim ever stray
and if all your hopes survive
destiny will arrive
and make all your dreams alive
for you!

12/22/06
THIS WEEK
Current Events..........Gasoline The Movie Philosophy PLUS MORE...MUCH MORE!
Art/Fashion Auction......................................... Hey GUYS! Hand Painted Ties!
Jane Eyre Originals in Gallery!
Love Letter/Current Affairs...............................Mirth? + Jesus and his Mom Mary
Patron Saint......................................................Mother Jones
Hand Book For Hot Witches..............................The Ace Of Cups

CURRENT EVENTS
^v^ Gasoline The Movie philosophy abridged ^v^

This is a fairy tale for you, America.
Hot cars, fashion, sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll, are used to tell an analogy.
The true message behind Gasoline is that MAGIC and LIFE prevail over today’s nuclear socio-economic and environmental threat.
A family of post apocalyptic, rock star witches search for Gasoline in a nihilistic landscape.
They are from a utopian society where technology works with nature and everything is recycled or reused.
All races live together but retain their autonomy and cultural histories, lending them to the classless society to help the human race be strong and survive.
Gasoline is here to teach and inspire every individual to count on your own utilitarianism, creativity, and versatility and to face the apocalypse with flexibility and humor. Which is also how we are producing his movie.

Really makes the apocalypse sound funny right?


ART/FASHION AUCTION
^v^ Jane Eyre originals ! + Ties ^v^
Remember the Illustrated Jane Eyre that just came out on Putnam Penguin? Well not only is it available signed with original drawings in each one, on Dame Darcy.com....but the original illustrations are framed and available in the gallery, prints are also available, all for very affordable prices. This E bay auction features TIES! Ties? TIES! need I say more?--------> (http://myworld.ebay.com/dame_darcy/)
LOVE LETTER
^v^ Jesus and His Mom Mary ^v^
When I think of Christmas I think of...Hmmm, sleigh bells on Kit666tens, Velvet Blue Girls Tied up in White Sashes, Snow Flakes on my Warm Noodles, Bright Copper Kettles With Crisp Golden Wings...These are a few of my Favorite things...
Naw, when I think of Christmas I think of...Fundamentalism! Yeah that’s it! We’ve all heard of fundamentalist Christians but journalists, film makers, novelists, rock stars, critics, and other artists can be fundamentalists too...so can liberals, atheists, capitalists, hedonists, the patriot, the nihilist, the dirty hippie, and the goth.
All of us are dogmatic and fundamentalist. Don’t let your imagination be enslaved to your belief system.
When fundamentalism gets dangerous is when we artists, (who are the reflection and also the designer of society) believe the hype and start generating depressing nihilistic views of the human condition.
The fundamentalists need to loosen up and stop taking themselves way too seriously. Why all the ego anyway?
What happened to our pal, Mirth?
And speaking of Mirth I wanted to celebrate Christmas by wishing you all a Holliday card depicting the Hanukkah Harlot being butt fucked by Jesus---------> (http://myspace-794.vo.llnwd.net/01547/49/75/1547295794_l.jpg)
This was apparently the same card that the Bass player from Quiet Riot used, I’m biting his style this holiday season.
Satanica is the biggest purveyor of Mirth in all the land and even throws a Festival of Mirth!
And Speaking of Jesus and the season of Mirth I’d like to send a friendly warning shot across the bow from the Catholic Witch team, and proclaim, “Thanks Jesus for hanging out with whores!”, Also, thanks for practicing magic, drinking wine, and always being the life of the Christmas party!
Thanks Jesus for being a Feminist!
And thanks Mother Mary for your immaculate conception, and for surviving as a pagan Goddess to inspire us all every winter solstice.
To read more witches opinions about Fundamentalism this Christmas please go to Rob Brezney’s Blog http://www.freewillastrology.com/
And speaking of Mother Mary...
PATRON SAINT
^v^ Mary “Mother” Jones ^v^
Here’s a little ditty you all know about the Apocalypse, or maybe it’s about Mother Jones, same diff...
OHHH! She’ll be comin’ round the mountain when she comes! WHEN SHE COMES! She’ll be comin’ round the mountain when she comes! WHEN SHE COMES! She’ll be drivin’ 666 white horses when she comes! WHEN SHE COMES! OH we’ll kill the old red rooster when she comes! WHEN SHE CUMS! We’ll all be shoutin’ “Hallelujah” when she comes! WHEN SHE COMES!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!MERRY X-MAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S.
more about Mother...
is “she” the train coming down the new born Midwestern tracks being laid out by Victorian workers? Or is “she” union organizer Mary Harris Mother Jones, going to promote formation of labor unions in the Appalachian coal mining camps. With her mythological white horses and the celebration to follow her arrival... OR is this song about the horses of the apocalypse and the end of the world?

HAND BOOK FOR HOT WITCHES
Winter Solstice Advent Calendar
Here’s a little info before you start:
Weds the winter solstice starts this Thursday the 21st of Dec.2006 the day after the new moon. So this is a good time to do a solstice advent calendar ritual about new beginnings!
There are 10 days between the solstice and the first day of the New Year.
The number 10 = completion. The number 11 = genius, fairies, and the Oroborous (the ultimate-infinite) and is the number of Gold
OROBOROUS+ALCHEMY=GOLD
In this spell the first day of the year Jan.1st Mon. starts on the 11th day of this spell.
OK here goes...
You will need for this spell:
*Anything you wish to enchant and inspirational images. *Green, White, and Red Candles (these will be alternating, so think about the element you want a little more of this year and put the red , green, or white candle as the extra one) *Gold Candle *Gold Pen *Matches *Paper *Drawstring pouch
0)Clean your house thoroughly
1)First lets look at the colors that represent Christmas Red= Passion, Love, sex, Green= Nature, wealth, White= Purity , white magic
2)Put 10 Green Red and White tapers alternating in a ring on a table (safe from any fire hazards)
3)Put your inspirational photo’s drawings, images etc. in the center...Also include objects on which you wish to cast a glamour and enchant: jewelry, your phone, etc.... Put it all in the ring on the table.
4) Meditate and focus on the images and objects as you light the candles clockwise.
5)Leave them lit for 20 minutes and meditate on the images
6)Think of 10 things that you would like to happen this year.
7)Write them on a sheet of paper(preferably in gold)rip them into separate sheets
8)Read them aloud then put them in the drawstring bag and place it in the center
9)Place the gold candle in the center but do not light it
10)Keep the first candle lit and burn it all the way down
11) Blow the subsequent candles out as after you blow each one say “Make my holiday wish come true”

12)Go to the top of a hill, the day of winter solstice and feel alive!
13) Each subsequent day until the first burn the candle all the way down and blow the others out
14) on Jan 1st burn the gold candle in the center all the way down, hang the inspirational photos on the wall and put the draw string bag under your pillow or where ever you want. Throw the wax away or bury it.
Eat black eyed peas and collard greens
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
 

3 comments:

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